Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Exes and Videogames. Part I

Most everyone has one. Some have several, some have few (and yes there are some, in one perspective lucky, who have none.)  Some are bros, some are hoes, some are nice, some are mean and some are hipster (yes, hipsters get love too) but I’ll get to the point, the people that I am talking about are exes.

Oh the exes. These people are either the perpetrators of the break up or they are the dumped. Okay I need to say this, there are instances where people say it was mutual…YOU ARE WRONG! It is never mutual! Someone is always more butthurt than the other. This is most definite.

I am no bitter Betty when it comes to this kind of thing, okay I lied sometimes I wish that they would become hipster so the general public would chase and beat them with a lead pipe, but hey, you can’t have everything.  If you caught your significant feeling up another’s lady bits (or dude junk) then yes, the herps will be full blown but if you caught them feeling up a horse, you should be concerned and call up animal control…CHEATING: YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG.

Okay so here probably one of the most common or the most sincere (*cough, cough*pussy*cough, cough*) reason, you simply fell out of love.

Sorry what? What exactly do you “fall” out of when you fall out of love? Yes, as previously stated the answer is love but how exactly do you “fall” out of it. Did you fall out of a plane? Did you trip off a bridge? Did Leeroy Jenkins ruin your raid and your night elf girlfriend saw you as a failure so she threw herself off Stonetalon Pass (of love)? (Side note: that was possibly one of the most painfully nerdy metaphors ever. For those of you who don’t know who Leeroy Jenkins is, you’re better off... it’s a WoW reference.) Seriously, who comes up with this shit? “Falling out of love?” No. You just have a balancing problem and should stay the fuck away from high places and or mythical flying creatures.



  1. People only say they, "fall out of love" because they're idiots and think that it would be the correct opposite "falling in love". If anything, the politically correct phrasing would be to, "climb out of love". Love is a pit. Love sucks you in. Love can eat you alive. I just hope that the next girl I fall for doesn't look like a Sarlaac.

  2. I hope she doesn't either. And hopefully, you are not speaking from experience. ;}

  3. We can just start calling me the Boba Fett of romance.

  4. You get shot by Han Solo?